I still remember the night I surrendered to Christ. It happened while I was at a Saturday evening youth group that I didn't feel like attending and had no plans to come back to. I was sobering up from the activities of the night before and was determined to repeat them later that night. My plans were interrupted, however, when, despite my best efforts not to, I encountered the presence of God in a way that I never had before. In that moment I was overcome and gave my life to the Lord and never got the chance to follow through with my initial plans of revelry. In that place, everything was so new I truly felt born again. After spending what felt like an eternity crying, I wanted someone to take me out to the pub (I didn't have a car or a license at the time) so that I could tell all my friends about this encounter with God that I'd just had. I wanted them to experience exactly what I had experienced. I wanted to tell them about Jesus. I never got there though. I was waived off by some Christians who had taken me aside that night and warned me about the dangers of going to the pub. 'There's demons there that will make you drink, you shouldn't go'. I was a bit taken aback. I wasn't entirely sure I had any convictions about alcohol at that stage and I felt a bit indignant that someone thought that some demon was going to 'make me drink'. But I stopped myself and listened to their advice. After all, they had been Christians longer than me, a new convert only an hour or two old, and so I figured they must know better. A few months later those same Christians were no longer in church from what I could tell. Whether they had just moved on or had gone back to the world, I don't know. I sometimes wonder though what might have happened if I had disregarded the advice of those who I thought were more mature than me and gone anyway. It wouldn't be the last time that I'd look up to people who were seen to be important in the church or look up to someone that I thought was mature only to find out that I was wrong.
So who can you look up to? What makes a Christian mature and worthy of imitation? What are the signs? And how can we grow in maturity ourselves? If it is a natural law that whatever we elevate and give prominence to we begin to emulate ourselves, then how do we ensure we are being transformed into the character of Jesus rather than something… else?
To begin with, I'd like to highlight some areas I've often mistaken for maturity that actually aren't…
False Signs of Maturity
Gifting, Talent, Charisma - When God finally gave Israel permission to have a king, despite warnings about desiring an earthly king, they set their sights on one named Saul. According to 1 Samuel 9 Saul was a handsome man and a head taller than anyone else. In other words, he was a man who would look the part of a king. While Saul did a number of good things for Israel and even had some incredible spiritual encounters, in the end he wouldn't stand the test of time. He didn't have the heart after God that was necessary for him to lead God's people long term. In the church today we have so many incredibly talented people. People who are gifted in business, musicians and singers, charismatic preachers. All of these are able to bless the church through their service, and do so every day. Being gifted, however, doesn't make you mature (nor does it necessarily make you immature); being talented or charismatic doesn't make you worthy of imitation (nor does it necessarily make you unworthy of imitation). Unfortunately, there have been many times when we have elevated people to a place of prominence who could 'get the job done' or who could 'draw a crowd' but didn't have the requisite maturity to remain in that place.
Time Being a Christian - Everyone gets older. Not everyone becomes more mature. While it should naturally proceed that someone who has been walking with the Lord over the course of 20 years should be more mature than someone who has only been on that journey for five, it's not always the case. There are many Christians who, having come to salvation, never progress into maturity. They are the ones who the author of Hebrews would say, ‘by now you should have been teachers' but instead need 'the basic principles of the faith' taught to them again (Hebrews 5:12). Natural age or 'time in the game' does not mean that someone is mature. We hope that it is. To be sure, I've been incredibly blessed by many long-time, older, Christians. But just because someone has been in church longer than you doesn't necessarily make them worthy of imitation.
Knowledge - To quote the King James Bible "knowledge puffeth up". During my walk with the Lord, I have met some very smart people in the church. People with an ability to comprehend and retain theological ideas and biblical knowledge at a staggering rate. Sometimes people like this can overwhelm other Christians with their recall and ability to explain things. But data recall and even comprehension is not the same thing as maturity. When knowledge is elevated or celebrated above maturity in the Church, it's been my experience that Christians can become overly cerebral and clinical with one another. Others are judged by their ability to 'keep up' with whatever the latest theological debate is about and how well they can prosecute the case for their own opinion; fellowship becomes about who holds the right ideas about God or certain passages of scripture, fostering a sense of theological tribalism. While I hope that most Christians would naturally grow in knowledge over time - which should be the case as a natural course of becoming familiar with scripture and healthy teaching in the church - it would be a mistake to think that just because someone is knowledgeable that you should follow in their footsteps.
Dramatic Spiritual Experiences - We live in a world where the physical and spiritual realms overlap one another. Some people are naturally more sensitive to the latter realm and as a result have had incredible experiences of things from that place. The bible is replete with examples of God's people having heavenly encounters and ecstatic experiences. How these experiences are handled and engaged with varies. Every church is different. Some churches will heavily downplay these spiritual experiences while others will elevate them to a place of importance. In circles where they are elevated there is the risk that having these experiences is an indication of spiritual maturity. Younger Christians will look up to people who have had, or who claim to have had, these incredible experiences. But again, this is not a sure sign of Christian maturity. To use myself as an example, in my first couple years of being a Christian I had prophetic dreams, open visions, and encountered the demonic. I was still very immature in the faith and thank God no one that I was aware of was looking to me as a Christian example to be lived up to.
Leadership Positions - Of all the false signs of Christian maturity this one is perhaps the most difficult one to disentangle with. After all, our leaders are meant to be an example to the flock. It's been unfortunate that this hasn't always been the case and I've met enough people deeply hurt by church leadership. The reality is that sometimes Christians find themselves elevated to positions of authority and leadership within the church because of one of the already mentioned reasons. Maybe their family has been in the church for a really long time and a leadership position is perceived to be 'owed' to them. Maybe they are a gifted evangelist who has been able to grow the church numbers and so people feel like they need to be kept on-side. Perhaps they have a theological degree or even a doctorate and so it makes sense to put them in charge of teaching. I've seen all of these instances and more. While the church is greatly benefitted by those with higher education for teaching, and those who are gifted evangelists for growing the church, and long-time pillars of the church for providing relational stability, none of these things mean that someone is necessarily mature in the faith and worthy of imitation.
So if none of these things can be sure signs of maturity. What have I learned to look for? Be sure to stay tuned for Part 2 for an explanation of how Scripture describes maturity.